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June 10, 2005 - Friday

 (Expletive Deleted) Job Interviewers

I must have a “Kick Me” sign tattooed on my forehead or pinned to the back of my interview suit or something.

I had a job interview on Wednesday that I thought went pretty well. The interviewer and I had similar interests and backgrounds, we had a few laughs during the interview, I successfully answered his semi-trick Excel question. All in all, I thought I did well. As I was leaving, he said they wanted to make a decision by Friday (today) and that he’d call me “tomorrow” (yesterday).

And that triggered my bullshit detector: “I’ll call you tomorrow.” I’ve heard that before from interviewers from years ago who still haven’t called. I hate “I’ll call you.” Hearing it shook my confidence.

Well. He hadn’t called by 4:30 yesterday (surprise, surprise), so I went ahead and called him on the theory that you can’t lose a job you aren’t getting anyway and it’s better to be aggressive than to sit waiting for the phone to ring like a girl who put out on Prom Night. I got him on the phone and he apologized for not calling me sooner, said he was waiting for a call back from … someone … and could he call me back in half an hour?

Parry and riposte. Damn. What else could I say? “Sure!”

Well. Half an hour came and went with no call. 5:30 pm came and went with no call. The first half of today came and went with no call. Half of this afternoon came and went with no call. So what the hell, I called him again at 4:15.

Parry and riposte again: “Hey, can I call you back in five minutes?” That was an hour ago, and now it’s the end of the workday — and work week. And what do you know? He hasn’t called.

I hate interviewers like this. This is the second one in two weeks who has pulled this on me. I hate it because it’s disrespectful. I can understand why they do it — nobody likes confrontation or to deliver bad news — but it’s rude and uncalled for.

Treat me like the professional you’re supposed to be. I’m a big boy, I can take the bad news that you don’t want me — but just fucking give it to me, don’t keep me dangling from a phone wire waiting for it to ring.

Treat me with some fucking respect, please.


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 HBDGD

GraceDavis is the rockin’est worst nightmare Dr. Laura ever woke up from screaming. In honor of her birthday today — and in thanks for her major pimpage of Beth’s Avon Breast Cancer Walk — I offer the following haiku:

It’s GraceD’s birthday
Fifty years young today-ay
Blow out the candle!

(Fucking seven syllable line haiku bullshit…)


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