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November 9, 2004 - Tuesday

 Be Careful What You Wish For

My close personal never-met-him-in-my-life friend Jim at Meat of the Matter pledged to shave his head in the unlikely event that Bush won the election.

Oops.

Being a man of his word, though, he did it, which you have to admire if only because men always have possible impending hair loss in the back of their mind and so shaving your hair off is taking quite a leap because there’s a very real possibility you may never see it again. It’s something that terrifies men to their very core, reduces them to blubbering babies, makes them seriously weigh the positives of comb-overs. Or maybe that’s just me, clutched tightly in the grasp of male pattern baldness.

Whatever, the point is that Jim shaved his head, and it doesn’t look half bad. Pretty good, actually; he’s one of those rare white guys who can actually Bic it without looking like a Q-tip with ears. Also good to his word, he then posted a picture of hs new do. So far, so good. Then he casually mentioned that “I would love for someone to photoshop a tattoo of hair on my scalp.”

Oops.

Here you go, Jim, Flock of Seagulls style:


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 Mission Accomplished

Bush’s White House has finally done something I agree with: they’re replacing Attorney General John Ashcroft, who announced his resignation today.

It’s about friggin’ time.

An excerpt from his resignation letter: “The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.” In other words, Mission Accomplished. The mind boggles.

Ashcroft has been at or near the top of the list of things I don’t like about the Bush administration almost from Day One. I’m sure I won’t like his replacement — he will be appointed by W, after all — but I really don’t think they can come up with a worse candidate than Ashcroft was. He’s been the worst, most ethically corrupt AG we’ve had since John Mitchell under Nixon. Things can only get better without him. Our civil liberties are safer already.

You can tally this entry as an endorsement of a Bush White House action. It’s about as much of an attaboy as they’ll ever get out of me.


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