Diary of a SubUrban Housewife

A bumper sticker I saw the other day:

It’s all fun and games until they ask you to open up the trunk.

To People Who Live in The State of California: If for some reason find you have to go to the DMV, go here first and make yourself an appointment. You will thank me later. It’s the most civilized thing on the entire planet.

To The DMV in The State of California: Your appointment system rocks. However, if there was one teeny tiny area where you could use the slightest bit of improvement: it would be super nice if you put a small mirror on the back of the thing you stand in front of to take your ID/license photo. Last minute lipstick/hair checks would greatly enhance the picture taking experience.

A sign that allegedly hangs in the Sheriff’s breakroom in Men’s Central Jail:

The inmates have worked out today.  Have you?

About a month ago, I was driving to pick Zoe up from school in the afternoon.

In the course of my travels I happened to witness a car accident. I was traveling north, and was going to turn right at the corner. Since it was rush hour, there was a fair amount of traffic in all directions. I was in the process of slowing down because the light was turning yellow.

(I will now digress to that classic scene from Starman where Jeff Bridges–who learns all his human skills by observation–is approaching an intersection and starts speeding up as the light is changing. Karen Allen screams at him. Jeff Bridges replies that he thought that the yellow light means speed up.) (I will now digress even further because I was checking my Starman reference with the repository of all useless knowledge, my husband, and when he asked why I was asking him I told him I was writing an entry. His response, “Holy Crap.” He asked that I quote him.)

Anyhoooo….in true Starman style, the car in the lane next to me opted to speed up and go through the light (which was pretty red at this point). Alas, the woman traveling south was already in the middle of making her left turn. Two cars go boom into each other. No one was hurt, it was mostly just some crunched metal and both cars were drive-able.

The driver of the car that was traveling next to me pulled over on the other side of the street. The driver of the car that was turning left pulled over after completing the left turn. Since I was turning right, I drove right next to the driver who had been hit turning left.

I was in a bit of a rush, since it was getting late and I had to get Zoe, so I opened my window, called to the left turning driver, and gave her my business card. I told her I had witnessed her accident and she could have her insurance company contact me if necessary. Just to be clear, I gave my business card to the left-turning driver because I was passing her. Had I been continuing up the street, I would have given my card to the other driver.

A couple of weeks later I got a call from the insurance company of the woman who had turned left. I gave my statement, frankly being as honest and impartial as possible. (Even though I kinda think that the guy driving next to me was in the wrong.)

That was kind of the end of it for me. I had fulfilled my civic obligation.

Fast forward to yesterday. After a two week absence from the office, I decided to go in. I checked my mail slot at the office and there was a greeting card kinda envelope in my box. The name on the return address was completely foreign to me. It was a puzzlement. I opened the card and it turned out to be a very lengthy thank you note that the left turning woman wrote to me. She thanked me for taking the time to give her my card and for talking to her insurance company. There had been no determination yet, but she was sure that if they found on her behalf it was because of my efforts.

Wow…a really thoughtful thank you note just for doing what I would have done under any circumstances. I was deeply touched. So, here’s the thing….I want to write this woman a thank you note for having sent me such a lovely thank you note. Is that crazy?

I’ve totally slacked in updating my Star Sightings. Two in the last couple of weeks.

Kirstie was having lunch at Chin Chin in Studio City. She came in with a bunch of teenage boys and was met by a friend. I’m here to tell you, she looked fabulous! And she used chopsticks to eat her Chinese Chicken Salad.

And less than a week later I was sitting on Vine at the stop light at Sunset, and who do I see getting into a black Maserati????

…the man who broke up with Carrie Bradshaw on a Post-it Note.

Over the last week or so we’ve had a number of people traipsing through our house en route to our freshly cleaned out garage to inspect the fridge we have for sale.

A woman and her son came by this evening to have a look at the fridge. To get to the garage, which is in the back, they went through our living room. While passing through, the livingroom we passed our new couch, a lovely deep red (tomato according to the fabric swatch) sectional. She said she loved the couch, and particularly the color because, she said,

“We’re doing our living room in NASCAR and that couch would go perfectly!”

Indeed…

So it’s been more than a month since I’ve posted an entry. It’s not that I haven’t sat down and starting writing one (or two or three or four), but they don’t seem to make it up here. And since I’m all about avoiding what’s on my laptop at the other end of this room, I thought I’d fill you in on the goings on here chez Atkins.

1. Middle School. Yup, the princess is in 6th grade and has officially started Middle School. The first week was a bit rocky, with 5+ hours of homework a night, but things have settled down and we’re in a groove now. This is her first year with actual letter and number grades (no more smiley face stickers in Middle School). And with the exception of math (the continued bane of our existence) the grades have been excellent. Even Latin (so those early years of reinforcing those neural pathways seem to have paid off, though right now I wish I’d focused on some math skills too).

2. Work continues to be excellent. Huge sigh of relief. We had a bit of a rough patch at the beginning of the summer but things have smoothed out and I’m once again a happy clam (except for now when I’m avoiding the drama on the laptop and writing this entry instead).

3. Chuck continues to travel to all the glamour spots of the world. This week: St. Louis.

4. I spent this past weekend in New York attending my 30 year high school reunion. Actually not my high school and not my year. Allow me to explain: I moved to Los Angeles to finish my senior year of high school out here. The reunion was from the high school I attended when I lived in Brooklyn. And technically it was the official reunion of the class of 76 (I was the class of 77) but then it turned into a multi-year reunion thing so I went. Most of the people I went to high school with I started going to school with in kindergarten, and many of them were there. And I have not seen these people in the 30 years it has been since I lived in Brookyn. But the odd thing is, I have not actually aged 30 years (although there’s a picture in my attic that is very very old.)

I anticipated a lot of really big hair, long fingernails, and sequins. I was disappointed on the hair issue, but there were enough sequins to choke a horse (which I don’t guess is many sequins actually cuz they’re likely to get stuck in your throat), and a lot of really long, really dark red, painted fingernails. Ladies of leisure I suppose. I did not wear sequins, thankyouverymuch, but instead chose a lovely black knit jersey wrap dress that packed really well.

I stayed on Long Island with the woman who was my best friend in high school. I saw her last about 19 years ago. We spent most of my time there (with the exception of the reunion) catching up, and that was nice. Her mom was staying with her for the Jewish holidays. Terri’s mom was old when we were in high school, so now, 30 years later, she’s positively ancient. But her mom looked exactly the same as she did back then. Go figure.

4. This summer I enrolled Zoe in Cotillion and she started last night. Party dresses, tights, appropriate shoes, white gloves and all. She is going with Katie and they’re both absolutely thrilled about this (as you can well imagine). Katie’s mom and I watched for the first half hour or so and then left. We were there long enough to see the girls do their first waltzes. When I returned to do pickup detail they were on to the foxtrot. Chuck left me the digital camera to immortilize the moment, but naturally when I went to take a pic last night it was out of batteries and he has the charger with him in St. Louis. I’ll get better pix at our next outing, but here’s one courtesy of my camera phone:

That’s all for now.

If someone with apparent bad taste compliments an article of clothing you are wearing, should you be concerned?

People who are Starbux regulars:  Buckies.

Seen on a plumbing truck:

Bob’s Plumbing

Where a flush beats a full house every time.